It’s all so quiet…

I realise that, yet again, I have neglected the blog – I really am awful at providing you all with regular updates on my life. One reason for my sudden quietness though is probably my lack of excitement. Ever since my return from the Highlands life has been nice but quiet. I headed to the Glasgow Mela two weekends ago which was good (but quickly turned into a pub crawl round the West End!) and then finally went to my first BBQ of the summer last weekend for Ricarda’s birthday which was actually a really good afternoon/evening. Apart from that though, I have nothing to report.

I’ve been feeling a little homesick of late. Actually, that’s a bit of a lie as I don’t actually miss home at all (sorry Mum!). I am however missing my friends immensely. While I absolutely love my job and the people I work with, outside of work life is just a bit dull at the moment. To me, only going out socially once or twice in a week is nothing – I’d be out every night if I could and given half the chance, I usually am. Furthermore, after living with friends for the last three years, I’m used to being around people all the time so I didn’t even need to leave the confines on my flat to be social. If truth be told, I don’t like living alone as much as I thought I did. So many people I know on Facebook, twitter etc. are jetting off on holiday, going travelling or heading to festivals etc and enjoying the summer, while at the moment it just feels like I’m stuck up here alone.

Money’s a bit tight at the moment as well so unfortunately I canny go down and visit people etc to fill my time. What with only having so little time left in Glasgow now (66 days to be precise!) I’m also really reluctant to go down to England if it’s not something really special – I feel I should be up here, making the most of Scotland while I can!

Sorry for this massive moan but I promise you, it’s really not all bad. My friend Hannah is hopefully coming to stay this weekend and July is looking like a busy one – I’m potentially down in Manchester, Lancaster and London all in the space of two weeks which is exciting! Won’t be so exciting when I review my bank balance at the end of the month but hey ho, it’ll all be worth it I’m sure ūüôā

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Tea for two and a slice of homesickness.

Today I took Eujin for her first experience of a proper afternoon tea at the rather nice Thistle Hotel in Glasgow.  We were lucky enough to get an absolute bargain on Groupon which meant we got a sparkling tea for two consisting of a glass of prosecco, sandwiches, three gorgeous cakes each (a delicious milk and white chocolate slice, a cream filled meringue with fruit and a mini strawberry tart), scones with jam and cream and a massive pot of tea all for only £9 which was brilliant!

Afternoon Tea! 

Eujin enjoying a glass of bubbly! 

After a very long and¬†leisurely¬†lunch we indulged in some well-deserved retail therapy and I managed to pick up my mum’s Christmas present – a pair of really cute Radley slippers which she’ll hopefully love! I’ve been so organised this year and I’ve now brought all my family presents so now I only have the friends to do which is good, plus I already have ideas for most people so I’m pretty sorted. Makes a nice change from rushing around and doing all my shopping on the 23rd December for once!

Lucky lady! 

Even though I had a really lovely day, tonight I’ve started to have my first proper pangs of homesickness for both Lancaster and Nottingham. I’m not only missing my student days and my Northern girls but I’m missing the best friend and all the home crew so so much. I especially miss the freedom of home and just being able to drive to the pub, or to the bestie’s house or just wherever and spend a couple of hours with them lazing about ¬†and having them put the smile on my face. Don’t get me wrong, I still love Glasgow but I’ve been feeling a bit fed-up and empty the last few days. I think part of it is because life revolves around work and uni applications at the moment and will do for the¬†foreseeable¬†future which is a drag. I’m not able to de-stress and relax in the usual ways with the usual people and I miss that and I miss them. It’s been 9 weeks since I left home which is the longest I’ve ever been away and I’m really starting to feel that now unfortunately, although I suppose it’s not really surprising.

I think the fact that Christmas is approaching is making things that bit tougher as well. Usually by now I’d be making lots of festive plans with the uni girls and planning my reunion with everyone at home and even though I sometimes tough it out and joke that I won’t be home until February probably, I don’t half wish I could nip home for a cheeky Christmas visit. Even though I have a few visitors making the journey up North soon (which I am rather excited about!) I would actually like to visit the places I miss as well as the people.

What I miss most is feeling close to the people I love the most.¬†I feel a little bit detached from everyone at the moment, both physically and emotionally. I’m pretty awful at keeping in contact with people and weeks slip by before I realised I haven’t sat down and had a proper chat with someone in far too long but, no matter how many phone calls or texts or emails, it’s just not the same as that feeling when you know you’ll be seeing someone and you’re giddy at the thought of having an emotional reunion at the train station. I know this is all my own fault – I knew when I moved away the implications and what this would mean and I guess I just tricked myself into thinking that things wouldn’t change and we’d all remain a close-knit bunch. More selfishly and naively I thought it’d be much easier to build the gaps in geography than it is. I know I need to get better at staying in contact with people and I suppose writing this post has made me realise that I need to sit down and actually make some effort (which is a good realisation, if not a little overdue!). I think a lot of phone chats and skypes might be¬†occurring¬†over the next week or two.

That Friday Feeling

I have now successfully completed the end of my second working week! YES.

This week has been a long one and, to be honest, it’s been a bit up and down. On the one hand, work’s gone well and I’m finally allowed to start doing some stuff by myself and have a bit more freedom. I’ve also complete the first section of my induction and finally planned what I need to do when, so it definitely all feels a lot more manageable which is good. I still have a hell of a lot of reading and learning to do but hopefully I can catch up on some of it this weekend and get ahead (or at least stay on track!)

I was also very naughty this week and booked tickets to spend Hogmanay in ¬†Edinburgh ūüôā I am SO excited already, even though it’s a good three months away! I can’t really afford it at the moment but decided,as I have the time off work and I’m in Scotland, it would be rude to. However, I am going to have to cut back for a few weeks somewhere down the line, although I won’t worry about that until I return from Milan at least. As you may have already guessed from reading this blog I am¬†truly¬†awful with money. I always say one day I’ll calm down (and I really will have to at some point) but, as they say, YOLO.

Anyway, I¬†digress. While this week has had its highs, it has also had its lows. As well as generally being a little stressed out regarding my induction, I also got my first pangs of homesickness this week. Actually, I’m not sure if it was homesickness as such because, while I miss my friend and family dearly, I don’t actually actively miss being at home. However, I just had the feeling that I wanted to be somewhere else and that maybe I’d made the wrong decision being here. I’m not sure what triggered it really (hormones probably) and it left as quickly as it came, so I’m feeling better now, but it wasn’t very¬†pleasant. I think all I really needed was a cuddle and a pep talk but, like I say, I’m feeling ¬†brighter today. I know in my heart of hearts this¬†is the best decision I could have made, I just need to learn to¬†persevere¬†through the more difficult bits and not doubt myself so much. Easier said that done but I’m working on it.

This weekend looks like another good one. Admittedly, tonight and Sunday are mostly going to be spent doing reading which is pretty boring but tomorrow I’m off to Edinburgh for the day! I’m really looking forward to visiting capital again as it is possibly my favourite city in the world and definitely somewhere I could envisage myself settling in the not too distance future. Me and Eujin are meeting up with a group of fellow CSV Volunteers, some of which I’ve met a few times and some I’ve never met before so it’ll be nice to get to know some new faces. The sun is shining over Glasgow at the moment (just) so here’s hoping the good weather lasts for tomorrow!